Top 10 Things Learned Watching Toddlers for 10 Days

Well, here we are. For 10 days I have watched my two children, two and four years old, while my wife has been out of the country. No babysitters, no going out on my own to run a quick errand, just me and the kids. 10 Days.  

Here’s a list of 10 things that I learned from spending 10 days with my kids while Mamma was in Mexico. 

1. I “don’t make beans like mom makes beans.” 
   I have always looked at food as fuel. I eat to live; I’ve never had the mindset where I live to eat. However, my wife is amazing at making a variety of meals and making them exciting. To be honest, before we met I basically lived on rice, cheese, and hot sauce. Maybe the occasional chicken breasts slow cooking in a crock pot with a bottle of Italian dressing for 8 hours. But children, especially my kids, appreciate a variety of meals. They also ask for a variety of meals. Breakfast, brunch, lunch, snack, dinner. You could spend your entire day in the kitchen just preparing these meals! The first morning, my son kindly told me that I “don’t make beans like mom makes beans, but that’s OK we can still eat them with chips.” 

2. Routines change and grow. 
   I have always had a morning routine. I love it. It sets my day on the right track. When we turn chapters in life sometimes our morning routines change. We expect it and we anticipate it by planning ahead for that change. I remember when I went to college as a music major for undergrad, my morning routine included one hour of practice before most other college students woke up. And this was after showering, daily reading, and breakfast! When we had our first kid, my two-hour routine quickly changed. But I anticipated it. Now, my routine includes very little to be counted as complete. It has simplified. Now, my kids love to join me in my morning routine sometimes. And while this actually makes it much harder, it is something that I really am enjoying seeing as a development. Sometimes you have to be OK with the routine interruptions and make way for new routines to develop themselves. 

3. Fears are sometimes irrational – but are very real. 
   Everybody has a fear in life. Sometimes those fears are irrational. I can go into why I am irrationally afraid of live poultry, but I’m not going to. It will not change; I will always be afraid of them. Maybe the same will go for my daughter’s fear of crocodiles. There is a crocodile statue in my neighbor’s yard. Even though it has never moved, this is a very real thing for her, and it is terrifying. I know eventually she will overcome this fear of this statue crocodile. But for the time being, it’s OK for her to be afraid, there are scary things in the world! Learning how to deal with our fears is important. Overcoming these psychological hurdles helps each of us to grow in big ways on an emotional level… eventually. 

4. I appreciate my wife, and my kids appreciate her too. 
   Parenting alone is hard. Yes, my kids are truly inspirational at times, but so much when they are at full capacity. The amount of work my wife does in our house, for our kids, for me, for us, at her job… She is simply amazing, and I appreciate every little ounce of energy she has given us each and every day. The kids appreciate her as well, even if they don’t say it. I can see it in my lackings. Also, mad props to all those single parents out there. You’ve got this. 

5. Every moment can be magical. 
   I made it a goal to only have my phone ringer on during these 10 days to be able to receive calls during the two-hour period I designated for work while my son was at school and my daughter was hopefully napping, but also in earshot in case my wife called. Aside from that, I wanted to be as present as I could with my young ones and not buried in the screen of emails. This proved to be very beneficial, as you never know when a four-year-old will say something truly hilarious or mind-blowing. 

6. Music can change everything. 
   I know the value of the right music in the right moment. Music changed my life; I have a whole degree in it now! When a child has an outburst, or even a parent is on the verge of an outburst, the right song at the right time can truly change everything. Whether that is Vivaldi, Mozart, Foo Fighters’ “Best of You,” or “Head, Shoulders, Knees, & Toes;” music has a power to change an environment dramatically. 

7. The kids… they’re watching. 
   Our first is four years old, we know what it means to have them copy what you do and say. But wow, when you are the only adult around, they really are watching you. Waiting, for something new to try that you have showed them, some new word to say that is new to them linguistically, anything and everything can be mirrored. Even when you do not expect it, they are watching. They listen to everything. I realized this again when I walked into my kids’ room, and my daughter was doing the very smallest bits of scat. This of course being about 20 minutes after I was doing the same type of thing at the kitchen sink while doing dishes. I know it was not just sounds coming out, because it was also in rhythm. I am glad I watch my tongue… they are always watching and listening. 

8. Pillows. Blankets. Popsicles. 
   Sometimes, a bribe is the only way to win the battle. At the end of the day, after all that we have gone through, the comfort item is really just what will do the trick to help get the job done. Whether that is the job of picking up toys so we can use pillows and blankets to build a fort, or that job is brushing our teeth in the morning just to be able to have a popsicle later after breakfast. Each child has their own bribe item. 

9. Ecce homo. 
   “ɛksi ˈhoʊmoʊ” (or Ecce homo) are the Latin words used by Pontius Pilate in the Gospel of John, presenting Jesus, scourged, bound, and crowned with thorns, to a crowd (John 19:5). “Behold the man.” 
   I’m not sure when it happened, what happened to that caused it, but at one point I stopped what I was doing, turned towards my kids, put out my arms and loudly said these two words. I know they had no idea what I was saying. Maybe I was saying it to them, or maybe I was saying it as a prayer out loud in a moment overwhelmed with chaos around me. Either way, I am but a mere man and can only do so much in a day. 

10. I learned my kids. 
    The most important lesson I started to learn in these 10 days was this. I started to learn my kids. Both of them are extremely energetic, inquisitive, and caring; in different ways. 
    Both of my children learn, in different ways. 
    Both of my children are energized, in different ways. 
    Both of my children get tired out, in different ways. 
    Both of my children love, in different ways. 
     
    Learning our children is the best lesson I began to learn in this 10-day journey. I look forward to continuing this lesson on a daily basis throughout the rest of our lives. 

Have you spent an extended period of time with your kids alone? What have you learned? I’d love to hear in the comments below or through a message. Let me know!